Long weekend equates to no work.

This last weekend was so active. I did many-a things.

On Friday...I went to a mud-wrestling frat/sorrority party. One of my friends knew the guy planning the festive event. So, we packed into Andrea's car and got there. We waited....and waited....and waited. Finally at midnight, after the wrestlers got "loosen" up. They came out and mud-wrestled. It was boring after five minutes and I got mud and water on my clothes. Not too much, but enough to get me annoyed. But...the highlight was when a crazy bearded man got on the platform and proceeded to strip and then jumped into the mud. A skinny skrawny mid-aged man. He was obviously really drunk. But, the security came and got him out of the mud and made him put his clothes back on. Then, kicked him out. When we left, I saw him standing under a shadow of a tree in front of the fraternity house head bowed and looking desperately forlorn. As if he was expelled by God from the Garden of Eden. He carried such a desolate look. Such sadness.... I don't know why, but I really symphatized with this drunken man. It seemed so pure. No care for dignity or shame. He just stood outside - under a shadow of a tree caused by a nearby streetlight (obviously for dramatic effect) - solitary and rejected in a slouched posture with a bowed head staring into the ground blacken by night and rain. I was staring back as we walked away.

On Saturday, I went of San Francisco.

Sidenote -
here's a little exerpt from my wonderful high school recounted by a friend who goes there now:

dreaminjuls: some kid had two knives
dreaminjuls: two swords, and he'd wanted to take people out
dreaminjuls: but teachers definitely saw him armed
dreaminjuls: so they were chasing after him
dreaminjuls: as he was running away
dreaminjuls: a kid got in his way
dreaminjuls: so he slashed him
dreaminjuls: the kid had 17 stitches at arlington memorial
dreaminjuls: the security took him down
dreaminjuls: and then clases continued as usual

SERIOUSLY! GEEZ!!! Stupid kids are so damn impressionable. And movies like Kill Bill don't help. WTF!!!

Anyhow, back to SF. I went to SF by myself at 2:30 PM and wandered around Chinatown until Steph and Alissa meet with me at 6 PM. So many ASIANS!!! Wow. There are so many. many.... (I have to emphasis it). I wandered and brought two worthless things because everyone else was doing it. (and I couldn't stop myself) I got myself a lantern and a medal-ish thing. I'll take a pict and post it sometime. But, I saw so many interesting couples along the way. Take a flamboyant fat sloppy asian with a bright-eyed wannabe gangsta. I made me wonder how they came to be. How did that happen? Doesn't it make you think? Then you think about yourself - what will you be? Haha. But, the mentioned couple was walking behind me for a good while and their conversation was even more entertaining. But, yeah.... oh, here's the link to the site of the SF Chinese New Year Parade. Overall, it was really rainy - meaning it was raining on and off the entire time. I had with me a bright blue umbrella so I was content. I found a really awesome playground/park in the middle of the city. It was so great. Haha. Exciting huh? Well, Steph, Alissa, and I didn't really watch the parade. We kinda chased it. The main goal of the night was to eat good Chinese food. So, it was necessary to get to that street. However, the parade blocked everything. We had to follow the entire parade route to get to that street. But, some blocks were completely blocked with people, so we had to circumvent blocks (like three times). So, by that time, we were tired and whatnot, so we stopped to eat at a restaurant and didn't care for the parade.

The food was AMAZING! It wasn't too expensive either. I think the restaurant's name was Oriental Pearl - really nice and formal with good food and relatively inexpensive. So, I was happy. Then, afterward, we thought we would miss our train - hence, we ran to the train station only to discover that there wasn't a 9 PM train on Saturdays. Yeah, sweaty and angry. The Caltrain was also running slower that night. I got back to the dorm at 11:40 PM. I was bummed out. So, I went to bed.

On Sunday, I did nothing except watch the Simpsons.

Monday was a holiday (no school). I went to SF to watch La Mala Educacion by Almodovar. It was exceedingly good. But, it was pretty explicit - artfully explicit, not too vulgar. (the lighting and hues for those scenes were great). Haha, the cinematography was oh-so precise. There were plenty of loaded themes and it was thoughtful. I liked it. You should see it.

I got back at 5 PM and worked until 7 then went to Orgo review session until 8:30 then went to ASES meeting that got cancelled. I missed dinner and was insanely tired. Chem 2nd Midterm was not too satisfactory. English paper was not uplifting. Last Econ midterm was not reflective and also disappointing. I guess right now is a dark period for me. Hmmmm.

I saw Twelfth Night yesternight by Stanford Shakespeare Society. It was really enjoyable. Nice bending of sexuality. Shakespeare really hit the spot.

Okay, tonight I MUST go out and have some fun. OH, it's almost that special day again. I'm sure you know what that means. Hopefully it'll be a nice day. I want to have a nice dinner the following Friday with friends. I won't build any expectations though.

Okay. C'est tout. I'll get back to you later.

The people who worked to get the thing going. Jason, Steph, Hoa, me, and Olivia - missing Meiyang. 

People eating and stuff. 

Red lucky envelopes with candy. 

REAL rice and chinese sausages. 

Lots of pork dumplings ready for boiling. (pictured only half; also vegetarian ones available) 

Those were sweet dumplings that were made from flour and whole mung beans. Also, mung beans in seaweed and tapioca pearls - in the background. 

This was from the dorm Chinese New Year's party. We made those egg rolls - me and Hoa. 

Lots to see.

This last week Lunar New Year (commonly known to people as Chinese New Year). However, it also encompasses other countries too - regardless of the fact that all asians look alike and are Chinese.

But....anyhow....Our dorm made some food and it was all swanky. We brought food on the previous Sunday and prepared and cooked on Sunday night, Monday night, and Tuesday afternoon and night. We served on Tuesday night. I think I put in a total of about 8-9 hours. INSANE!!!! We made eggrolls, pork dumplings, rice and sausage, sweet dumplings, and mung bean sweet soup (thingie). And there were red envelopes and sweeten tarts - soursop, gourd, and coconut. It was a lot of work - unsurprisingly. But, people were happy and it nice to see that. And it reminded me of New Year stuff at home. So, I'm not really complaining...it just seems like so. Next year, I just want to do it with a small group of friends. Then, we wouldn't have to mass-produce and we could try out more things. It should be fun.

But, other than that. I went to the campus celebration in White Plaza. There were many-a performances - Wu Shu, Lion Dance, Cambodian flower dance, and Vietnamese hat thing. It wasn't spectacular but it had cheap asian food. I like that kinda stuff. Haha....

I plan on going to the San Francisco Chinatown New Year Parade next Saturday with some friends. Now for that - I'm really excited. It's suppose to be one of the top ten parades in the world. So, It better be good. OR ELSE!!! *shakes fist in air in a belligerent manner*

But, other than that.....

On Friday, I went to a piano concert on campus by a really renowned pianist (pee-an-ist, not pee-nist) Thomas Schultz. He played more classic Schubert and Liszt with more contemporary Rzewski and Stockhausen. I was so tired but whatever I did hear when I was awake was really enjoyable and good. It was so precise! and passionate... I also saw "The Virgin Suicides" by Eugenides that night with Libby. It was so strange. Yeah.....just strange and crazy. (my type of movie....haha)

Then on Saturday, I paid $7 to see Vaginas. Meaning I saw the Vagina Monologues. They were also really good. I must applaud the creativity and deliverance of the show. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Afterward, even I appreciated my vagina that I don't have. It was that affective. I just can't imagine someone coming out of a show like that and not like/respect vaginas - or be sexist. But...afterwards, I went to Roble's party by myself to visit Amy. The theme was "Flashy Trashy" and mud-wrestling was available. It was nicely crowded. I had fun. Then I went home and slept at 3:30. Insane!

There were like five other parties that night. OH......I've been sick lately. I still am. Damn the common cold. I feel like crap!!! (notice the triple exclamation points) But, it's getting better. I hope I don't jinx myself. That would be unpleasant to be sick again.

It's a rainy Valentine's Day. It's so great. I like the dark ominous clouds above. I like the wet and drippiness of today. I like the surge of downpour. Roses that are wilting as I type not even lasting half a day. Roses that prick and bleed you. It's all so merry indeed. (Pardon my light skepticism)

But, last night (Sunday) I saw a hip-hop and jazz dance concert hosted by Stanford's DV8. It was really good. I enjoyed it. It had about 6 other groups performing....So many asian dancers. It's CRAZY. craziness. But, I enjoyed it - especially it's progressiveness (take it to mean whatever you want it to mean - hint - nerds, umpa lumpas, and sexuality). It was refreshing.....to say the least....especially the last act. Most people didn't catch it. But I did.

So...this week is my resting week before my second round of midterms. So, I better enjoy it. Hope to enjoy the next week.

A bientot.

L'amour est insensee. BLAH!

Been a while.....

since I've rambled on this thing.

I need to continue to practice this priceless skill. I've been sitting through many more noticeable silences. I wonder if it's me. Or everyone else around me .... probably the prior.

I been thinking too much lately. Overthinking. Overanalysing. Yet, it's all just a blurb in the end. Nothing more or less. I question than I ponder to nothing. Chasing a tail that seems infinitely out of reach yet so close.

This last week was a lapse for me. As any overworked, overstressed, sleepdeprived student during exam week, I've been just following mechanisms of actions. Just doing steps methodically. Just following the necessary steps along the road of academia and in the process successfully shutting almost everything else out. I commend thee, the intelligentsia. But, I'm not ready to dive into the complete oblivion of pure knowledge. I'm still stupidly clinging... to what?.... I'll figure that out soon.

Call it intuition. instinct. (such a loaded word) Call Falstaff to explicate. (can you create this intrinsic - can you learn instinct? isn't that a direct negation of its identity? Or is identity just another fabrication to define boundaries ... of course words have boundaries..... but why?)

weirdness.

Lately, I've been occupied with identity. With self. Why are memories stringed together? Why bonded together by links that all intertwine and confuse. Why chain together notions and ideas and identities? Sometimes, I want to grap all of these connections and *snip*. . . . Nothing . . . more. No more logical senses. Just autonomous thoughts. No more implicated prejudices through dirty strings of relation. Just pure individual ideas.

A purity. untainted by bonds. free.

But, just as I rant, I do the same things. I can't help it. Then, I despise myself for it. Or I just accept. Is that how it should be? Should I accept as most do implicitly? I think I don't want to. But, what is the alternative? None. everything goes back to connection.

Sometimes, I want to desperately find a tautology. But, of course I know that I won't find it before I even start. I still search. I still find nothing. With the acceptance of a lack of a totality, I polarize to the other extreme.

I resonate. Sometimes to quickly. In the best sense of resonance too. I blink. I relay.

Do I want to?

I'm asking to many questions. Or am I? ARGH!!!!!

I might as well interject historical occurences now. Otherwise, I just forget things.

Last weekend I did nothing. I watched Hero again. I drifted. I'm drifting. I feel like I'll continue to drift. Where to? I'll just wait to find out. But, last week I had my first organic chem midterm. Then, I turned in my first essay in literature. Henry IV. I'll have econ monday. Then, I'll just jump back into the cycle of normalcy again. That's it. Nothing more except hours upon hours of my thoughts. meandering thoughts. ephemerally sound thoughts. Sound for links. crazy by itself.

I did listen to the Spoken Word Collective yesternight. It was good. I enjoyed that. More so than I would imagine. I was glad I went.

poesie. . . . . tu es trop contente. Je veux etre comme vous. Mais non....

Enough for now.

Conflicted?

(does this word come to mind?)

Ha.